virgin

MYTH [FALSE]: Bleeding during first sexual intercourse is a sign that a girl/woman is virgin.

FACT [REALITY]: Bleeding during first sexual intercourse is not a test for virginity of a female.

Why is bleeding associated with virginity in a girl?
Bleeding happens because hymen gets torn. However hymen can get torn due to activity other than sex, as vigorous exercise, cycling, playing, sports, menses, and masturbation.
What is virgin or virginity?
What is hymen?
What is chaste or chastity?
What is the test for determining virginity in a boy and in a girl?
How can you tell if a girl/boy has had previous love affairs?
Is my love affair or sexual relation first affair in her/his life?
How to know this?

RESPECED SIR
HELLO,

I HAD SEX WITH MY GF FOR FIRST TIME BUT SHE DID NOT BLEED WHEN WE HV SEX AS I KNOW THAT SHE USE TO PRACTICE YOGA AND GYMNASTIC FOR LONG TIME BUT IS THERE ANY METHOD OR MEDICAL TEST BY WHICH I CAN GET TO KNOW THAT SHE HAD A SEX WITH ANYONE ELSE 2 OR 3YEARS BACK BECOZ SHE IS WITH ME SINCE LAST ONE YEAR KINDLY GIVE ME THE PROPER ADVICE IT WILL BE SO KIND OF YOU SIR
THANKYOU

REPLY TO THE QUERY
Hi,
Blood during first sex is a superstition that is driven away long time ago. For a virgin it is not necessary that there be blood during first intercourse.

1
Think whether from the time she is with you, is she loyal and committed to you.
About the past there is no use wasting time thinking. It is a fool’s play.

2
What is your age?
What is her age?
Some infatuation in mind can happen to all teenagers some time or the other in their life. It is more so because the age at marriage is getting delayed. Best age is after teen age that is after nineteen. 20 to 25 years is best age to get married.

Think seriously about your marriage so that the romance becomes cemented and uncertainty vanishes.

3
In general it is very unlikely that a girl gives in sexually unless the relation is committed as it is with you and her at present. Thinking about past is creating mental ghosts, which have no relation to your and her happiness of being together.

Do not pester yourself with these thoughts.

4
Difference between men and women:
She gives sex because of love. You give love because you want sex.
Male being sex centric he has fears related to sex.

5
Another method to think is to consider the worst.
Suppose she had sexual relation in past, so what?
Are you living in past or present?

Make a new beginning with your own life.
Let today be the first day of your rest of life.
Live a quality rich life.

Please let me know if you have any additional questions or
issues.

Best regards,
Dr. Ashok Koparday
MBBS, FC SEPI
Medical Director
Samadhan India
Center for Therapy, Education, Research in
Sex, Marriage, Relationships

Ex. Teaching Faculty
Seth G. S. Medical College and K. E. M. Hospital and
Grant Medical College and Sir J. J. Group of Hospitals
University of Mumbai, India

Member: Indian Medical Association
Maharashtra Medical Council Registration
Member: Family Planning Association of India
Fellow: Council of Sex Education and Parenthood [International]
http://mysexdoctor.blogspot.com _ _ _ _ _sex matters


Virgin is one who has never before had sexual insertion. In a virgin hymen, which is a delicate thin papery covering over the entrance of the vagina, is unbroken.
This can be seen on medical examination. So medically virgin is one in whom hymen is not broken.
In case of male virgin is the one who has never had insertion during sex with anyone.

What is chastity?
Chaste is defined as a person who has never had sexual or love affair and therefore of good moral conduct.
For male and female the definition of chastity is the same.

Hymen can get broken without sex with some one.
Hymen can get torn during heavy menses bleeding, during masturbation, while riding a bicycle or two wheeler, sports and athletics, while playing and falling. Hymen is thinner than a tissue paper. Friable and is often broken before marriage despite no sexual activity.

Being chaste or chastity is being morally scrupulous and not having sexual affairs or intimacy affairs with someone else. So a girl may be flirt, yet since she has not had insertion during affair so she is virgin. A girl may not be virgin (the hymen is broken due to menses, sports) yet her character is chaste. Chaste is non flirting type.

PREJUDICE: Female v/s Male
Virginity and chastity are almost always used in reference to females, not males. A male would prefer to marry a virgin. Actually it means, the male prefers to marry the one who has never had love affairs, therefore he is her first and only lover.

A girl would also prefer her boyfriend to be virgin (never had sexual relation with someone else) and chaste (never had love affair with someone else).
Yet there is hardly any fuss about male’s behavior but there exists expectation of virginity and chastity of a female. This prejudice can get so far that in some Arabic countries, in some Muslim community the woman is totally covered from top to toe in black gown, only the two eyes are visible. Some such countries have merciless punishment to anyone who is found to ogle at a girl even though masked.
Dr. Prakash Kothari’s famous line is:
A girl may be virgin, but not chaste. (Chaste in one who has not had love affair)
A girl may be chaste, but not virgin. (Virgin in the sense that hymen is unbroken in female or no sexual intercourse ever in case of female or male)

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